It has been a rough month. Today, Dec 27th, marks 9 months since Frankie was killed. We were engaged on Christmas night surrounded by my family in 2005. It was such a beautiful night that, thankfully, I have on video. I had no idea Frankie was going to ask me . We never even looked at rings together. He went and picked out the diamonds himself and had them set. It is perfect. Our engagement night was so perfect. He sang to me when we were alone, a beautiful song that I hold dear to my heart. I miss him so intensely - and I am so frustrated that every time I try to talk about him, people skirt around it - or change the subject or try to comfort me by telling me I will find someone else ------ that just plainly makes me angry. It stings every time - the same painful sting. Frankie is my husband - and always will be. So, if you want to comfort me, and those words come to mind ---please....don't say anything at all.
I am not single!
I won’t meet someone else!
I will not get over losing my soul mate – ever!
Frankie will not send me someone else!
I am his girl.
He is the only person I have ever told I loved – I waited to find him.
We know we are God-given.
It is OK if you don’t understand a love like ours.
Just watch – 10 years down the road – you will all keep saying the same things.
20 years down the road – you will think I made a mistake – and that I chose this path…it is anything but a choice.
30 years down the road – I will be 60 -and you will say - it is too late for her now.
40 years down the road –You will say – It’s too bad she never remarried – she must be lonely.
50 years down the road I will be 80 – you will say – she lived a good life - I bet she looks forward to being back with her love now that she is older.
I hope I do not have to wait that long to see my love – But I will wait and I will love him more and more everyday until I do – Until we are reunited.
We are Mr. and Mrs. Francis L. Toner IV – and will be forever ---whether you like it or not.
"Love is perhaps the only glimpse we are permitted of eternity." — Helen Hayes