12.19.2011

The Lonely

I hate the holidays. 
I'm trying so hard, and I don't understand this.  I miss Frankie, I miss our life.  I miss feeling like I belong to something absolutely incredible here on earth, and like I have to wait to be complete again until I die.
I am lonely.  I know everyone will say, but you are never alone...he is always there.  I know that, but sometimes missing him just takes over, and I cannot shake that painful feeling.




12.18.2011

Missing U



Sunday nights.  There is something that makes this night of the week unbearable.  It is a culmination of all the other nights of the week added up without him.  It was one of our favorite nights of the week, where after church we would usually pack a lunch and take a stroll down to Lanikai beach, and read our favorite books, or just sit and look out at our favorite place together.



We would go home, and usually head outside to barbecue a delicious dinner and play phase 10.  We would just laugh and talk and stare at the stars after eating.  Sometimes we would take a dip in the pool.  And then we would wind up the night relaxed on the couch or cuddled up in bed ready for another week to start. 

I miss our Sundays.  I miss every day...but Sundays were always just ours.